Blink 442

I love this photo of the first team squad of my beloved Newcastle Benfield FC, before the recent 6-0 win over Sunderland RCA. That was the night my club raised nearly £3k for Ward 34 of the Freeman Hospital, where our own Kieran Wrightson was successfully treated for cancer. The players did their bit as well, which got us on to thinking in the clubhouse about those whose careers at Sam Smith’s Park were brief and inglorious. After a bit of head scratching, this is our here today, gone tomorrow, blink and you’ll miss them, Benfield team from recent seasons. No offence meant -:

Sean Korsbo: Man of the Match on his only appearance away to Consett in 2014. Chucked it after he was left out the following week and made a single appearance for Whitley Bay after that; now with Walker Central

Aaron McEwen: Timid son of Steve Bowey. Went to Chester Le Street but didn’t make it there either; now in the Alliance with Birtley

Moses Makinde: Brilliant for an hour in his only home appearance, did his hamstring and went back to Germany the day after; enigmatic

Laurent Sansom: Monsieur Merde. Signed from Leam Rangers rather than Paris St Germain; hauled off after falling over against West Auckland and gifting them a goal; never seen again

Big Dave Barratt: Superstar DJ. Huge, bearded, ursine utility player, who answered a cry for help when we were down to the bare bones last March; never let us down

Matty McCarthy: Self-proclaimed “Best Midfielder at the Club;” hauled off in his only ever appearance back in August, then went to West Allotment, Whitley Bay and obscurity

Matty Wade: His dad won us the double; Matty never won in a tackle in his one outing away to Ryhope CW, failing to turn up for the next game then leaving for Australia

Bruno Pilatos: Arrived from Jarrow Roofing on the Monday, played as a subbed sub at Dunston on the Tuesday to no great purpose, went back to Roofing on Wednesday

Tomasso Panzavolta: Immaculately attired Italian; one sub appearance away at Consett when we struggled for a team then disappeared

Nathan Jack: Unplayable at Kendall in the FA Cup; unavailable every other game

Robbie Nolan: Invisible man; more clubs than Jack Nicklaus

Subs:

Ryan Gladstone: Mind’s gone blank…

Mark Brown: Played once at home to Morpeth; let in half a dozen

Liam Mooney: Not a patch on his legendary old fella, Chalkie

Shaun Utterson: Ran away to America

Michael Baxter: Another who prefers Walker Central to us…

Mind, every single one of them is better than this clown....