Dromio: There’s
no time for a man to recover his hair that grows bald by nature…
Antipholus: Why, but there’s many a man hath more with
than hair.
Dromio: Not a man
of those but he hath the wit to lose his hair.
(The Comedy of Errors II ii 75-77)
On Tuesday 25th March, I had fully intended to
attend the 125th Anniversary game between a Northern League Select
and an FA XI at Bishop Auckland’s Heritage Park, which is one of the very few
Northern League grounds I’ve not been to; the others are Newton Aycliffe and
Penrith’s new home incidentally. Everything was in place, with lifts there and
back organised until the toad work squatted on my life and made an early
departure an impossibility. Instead, I did my son a favour; having been given a
free ticket for Newcastle United versus Everton by our friend Gary, who was
stuck at work, Ben ducked out on the basis he needs to complete his A Level
History coursework on the Sheffield Outrages, which have little or nothing to
do with Neil Warnock’s tenure at Bramall Lane surprisingly enough. It was time for me to adopt the fatherly role
and take in the visit of The Toffees that allowed us to celebrate 10
Years of Tayls. In the absence of “Pards,” who was completing his 3
game stadium ban, the support needs the analytical words of someone they can
trust. Cometh the hour; cometh the man.
Suffice to say, I’m feeling desperately remorseful for
having attended SJP, but not for reasons to do with the eventual result. As
ever, my mantra is that it matters not one whit who is in charge of Newcastle
United, who plays for them or indeed where the team finishes in the league
whilst Ashley is in charge. We need Ashley OUT now and 100% Fan Ownership IN,
although I am prepared to accept 51% Fan Ownership as a transitional demand.
Consequently a 3-0 home reverse, though it may be a grievous wound in our
thrilling campaign to secure 8th spot in the Premier League and
disappointing though the final score was, is ultimately of very little meaning
in the wider scheme of things. The real
reason for my guilt was the fact that only 305 people made it to Bishop
Auckland last night and the league chairman alludes to how let down he feels by
that figure in his daily blog. I can’t speak for anyone else at my club Heaton
Stannington, but as a non-driver, getting to South West Durham by public
transport when I could only leave Tynemouth at 5.30 was an utter impossibility.
So, what was the game like? To be honest, not that bad;
certainly there was no truth in any witticisms that stated Pardew was the lucky
one to miss it because he was serving the last game of his stadium ban. Read
the www.nufc.com match report, as they call
it right; a logical, reasoned evaluation of an evening where we deserved to lose
to a better side, but not by such a margin. Biffa’s wise words are utterly
without malice, hysteria or the need scapegoat players with needless,
ill-founded ad hominem abuse. It
will be of utterly no consolation to Manchester United fans to learn that
Everton are a vastly improved side since Martinez replaced Moyes. In attack,
they were lethal; there has been no fiercer a critic of Tim Krul than me, but
the keeper had absolutely no chance with 3 superb finishes into the roof of the
net. Up front Everton were superb to watch; Lukaku, Barkley, Deulofeu and
substitute Osman were incisive and effective in a way that Newcastle United
will never aspire to be when Remy, our one world class player, is missing. This
does not mean our defence played badly; Krul, as has been pointed out, had no
chance with any of the goals and made three other impressive saves, while
Williamson was steady as ever and Coloccini made only one error, which gifted
them their final goal. At full back, Dummett may not be as good as Haidara,
whose absence is causing an outbreak of Marveaux Syndrome related to his
supposed ability, but he is a far better option than Santon and utterly
undeserving the bile-spitting penmanship and tweeting of a section of our
support who seem desperate for him to fail. Calling him “Ramage with a better
hairstyle” is simply stupid. However, we can concede that Yanga-Mbiwa, fine
player he is, had an utter nightmare and the return of Debuchy can’t come quick
enough. In midfield Tiote was excellent, while Sissoko, Gouffran and Anita all
put in worthy showings, even if the latter two players missed excellent
opportunities in the 2nd and 77th minutes respectively.
Anita’s miss, which was terrible, was the cue for the SJP fire drill which
gained greater momentum when Osman made it 3-0. Up front Cisse tried his best all night;
making runs, showing himself, never hiding, though De Jong remained a
disappointment; I remain to be convinced he can offer enough of a goal threat
at this level. The most ridiculous part of the entire evening was seeing Shola
lumbering onto the pitch in the 89th minute; was he supposed to
score a hat trick? One wonders exactly what level of irony was being employed
with that tactical switch and just exactly how did he feel when Carver told him
to get stripped? Still, it could have been worse; it could have been Tayls
fistpumping his way onto the pitch, which would have been enough to get me to
leave early. Instead, I stayed to the end and applauded them off; Yanga-Mbiwa
and De Jong apart, the team had given a decent account of themselves and had
been defeated by a good side. Sometimes you have to admit your limitations and
not start cry-arsing about how unfair the truth is; either on “the metty” home
with your pals or on-line, whether the subject of your complaint is NUFC’s
latest accounts, the most recent Fans Forum minutes of the club website or
coruscating judgements about NUST.
Unfounded criticism may sting, but the truth can wound. The
1967 Arab-Israeli conflict is often known as The Six Day War. John Reed’s
memorable account of the November 1917 Bolshevik Revolution was entitled Ten
Days That Shook the World. Andy Warhol once commented that “in the
future, everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes.” Somebody ought to mention
these facts to the Newcastle United Supporters’ Trust, as at the time of
writing, it is 65 days since their AGM when chair Norman Watson announced that
it was NUST’s intention to be more outward looking in the year to come and that
NUST’s board were seeking to properly engage with ordinary members. It is also 37 days since the results of
elections to the board of NUST were announced and, during that time, the only
contact from NUST to ordinary members has been a link to a dire on-line fanzine
from the dynastic Shachtmanites at the Football Supporters’ Federation and a
handwringing set of platitudes over the club’s proposed sale of the land behind
the Gallowgate without, it must be said, any suggestion of a meeting of members
to debate an organised strategy to this or any other developments.
Another intriguing post on the NUST website is an account of
the findings of the All-Party Parliamentary Football Group’s discussions on fan
involvement and the on-going campaign by Supporters Direct for more involvement
at club level. I find this somewhat ironic, considering NUST is still refusing
to engage with its own members. Personally, I sent an email to Norman Watson
asking when the next open meeting of NUST members would be taking place almost
two weeks ago; as yet I’ve had no reply. Perhaps I ought to take up my concerns
with Supporters Direct. Contrast NUST’s disinclination to acknowledge
correspondence from an ordinary member with the fact that Chi Onwurah MP
managed to get a response to her offer of an olive branch to Ashley, even if it
was a curt, brusque dismissal of her concerns by the owner’s factotum, Lee
Charnley who, in the manner of the late Sir David Frost, appears to have risen
without trace in the Newcastle United administrative hierarchy. Although,
bearing in mind that SJP is a sporting Marie Celeste on non-matchdays (a
situation that appears to be the eventual aim of the ownership when home games
take place in the future), anyone who is still in a job on Strawberry Place and
can compose a simple declarative sentence of confrontational intent could
clamber up the greasy pole in the way Charnley has.
However, we are not living in Elizabethan times; ambition,
as demonstrated by Macbeth for instance, is not to be frowned upon. Although,
putting oneself in the public eye, whether it is through promotion or
nomination, and I speak as someone intending to contest the Dene ward of
Newcastle City Council in the May local elections for the Trade Unionist and Socialist
Coalition, means that judgements will be made by those who encompass
the entire spectrum of humanity from the ignorant and indolent to the informed
and involved. To expect otherwise and to respond with the whiff of burning
martyr, as acrid as a smouldering tyre-strewn bonfire on the Eleventh Night, is
naïve in my judgement. Criticism is par
for the course; the sad fact is that much criticism is unfair and unfounded. A
dozen or so people were unhappy with the blog I posted last time out that
appears in the current issue of Stand magazine; some of them even read what I had to
say and a couple of them may have understood it. Much of the criticism was
inaccurate and unfounded, but I didn’t allow it to bother me. You simply can’t
please all of the people all of the time; the trick is to learn exactly who’s
criticising you in a constructive way and consider their points, perhaps even
take their thoughts on board, while factoring out the irrelevant, the
mendacious and the moronic.
I know one of the newly elected NUST board members
relatively well and like him tremendously, having worked at close quarters with
him in NUFC Fans United and admired his tireless devotion to both the Mike
Ashley Out Campaign and Time 4 Change. Knowing what I know
about him, I have dismissed out of hand in the most strident manner possible
the snide criticisms that others have mentioned to me, claiming that the prior
activities with which he has been involved have all been done with the intent
of getting himself a cushy number among the supporting elite. To suggest that
is the case is a preposterous and unfair lie. Let me state without question that I agree
with Steve Wraith’s comment in his editorial of issue 3 of #9 fanzine; Graeme
Cansdale deserves the freedom of Newcastle upon Tyne for the hours of
unstinting, devoted work he has willingly put in to try and save the soul of
Newcastle United.
However, and this is where things get difficult, I
understand the disappointment that is being expressed in many quarters with
NUST’s continued inactivity, especially post-election. I would equate it to the
feelings of being let down so many people experienced after Blair’s government
came to power in 1997 and absolutely nothing changed. The elections were a chance for NUST to
reinvent themselves and talk to we ordinary members. This hasn’t happened. Yet.
I know I didn’t stand for NUST board election and I realise
that if I had, I may not have been successful, bearing in mind the calibre of
the other candidates. However, and this is a big however, if I had come out of
that first board meeting post-election on March 11th , the same
night as the Under 21s hosted Chelsea in the FA Youth Cup and The Stan fell to
a 3-1 home loss to Chester le Street Town, knowing full well that the promised
interaction with members would not have been happening any time soon, and 15
days later I think it is fair to say none of us are holding our collective
breath in the expectation of a full public or members only meeting this side of
the Twelfth of Never, I would have gone public with that fact and fuck the
consequences even if it meant that I was in breach of some kind of protocol. After
all, NUST were in a hell of a hurry to publish the minutes of the first Fans
Forum on their website. I’ve not seen such alacrity when it comes to publish
accounts of their own meetings.
I call upon the NUST board to fulfil the promise of the AGM
of Wednesday 22nd January and address the ordinary membership via a
full meeting to discuss the strategy of the organisation moving forward. This
is needed not only to keep their word, but also to maintain the good name of at
least one of the newly elected board members. Perhaps it will also quell the
groundswell of dissatisfaction and disengagement Newcastle United’s support is
in danger of succumbing to. Far better we side with the carnivalesque
philosophy of Mikhail Bakhtin than subside to the SJP equivalent of Emile
Durkheim’s description of torpid anomie.
Rosalind: O, how
full of briars is this… world!
Duke: Sweet are
the uses of adversity.
(As You Like It II i 11-12)
