Jesus Fucking Krist

 

When looking for a silver lining while evaluating the incredible (in the literal sense of the word) appointment of Joe Kinnear as Director of Football at Newcastle United, I suppose I could make a case that this nonsensical turn of events, provides me with ample material for this week’s blog. Rather than being obliged to hammer out an uninspired, innuendo-laden piece, by stringing out the non-story of Cabaye’s alleged transfer to Monaco (impossible before July 1st, of course) over 3,000 words plus, with reference to how the Francophobic element of our support have taken time out from preparing their Gouffran voodoo dolls and are presumably dancing up and down The Corridor of Hate (aka Pink Lane) at this news, as this gets them off the hook for spreading the appalling untruth that St Mirren are charging more for the visit of NUFC Under 21s on July 30th than they do for an SPL game. For the moment though, we’ll leave that in abeyance as I’ve sorted that dreadful cross-border embarrassment out, by apologising to our buddies The Buddies on behalf of all Newcastle United fans for the way they’ve been mendaciously traduced, as well as forming the Tyneside-Renfrewshire Society for Mutual Friendship and Understanding. I’ll let you know how it develops.

 

However, I would be lying if I claimed any good would come of Ashley’s latest obtuse and seemingly vindictive decision. Let’s be completely clear about this; there is absolutely no positive angle to the appointment of Joe Kinnear to a senior role that means he is effectively second in command at Newcastle United, even when it is contrasted with the unmourned departure of the loathsome Llambias, or Lambezi as he will forever be known. From all he has said and all he has done, not just since the news broke on Sunday night of his return, but in his initial tenure as Newcastle United’s interim manager in 2008/2009, it is my opinion that Joe Kinnear has shown himself to be: a fouled-mouthed buffoon, a seemingly inebriated clown, a slurring, malapropistic idiot, a blustering, cantankerous fool. In short, however long his health or future events allow him to remain in post (and I’d wager his 3 year contract will not be honoured), Ashley’s effective deputy is both a disgrace and an embarrassment to Newcastle United; although, we’ve had plenty of those in the past. One of whom, Freddy Shepherd, has had the temerity to poke his head back above the parapet and give his unasked opinions on the current situation; frankly Shepherd’s audacity even trumps the egotistical chutzpah exhibited by Graeme Souness when offering Pardew tactical advice while things were going wrong last season!!

It needs to be pointed out however that to lambast Kinnear simply because he once had a go at The Daily Mirror’s Simon Bird in a press conference is a foolish thing to do. Lest we forget, as an elected Labour representative for the Denton ward, Simon Bird has been party to Newcastle City Council’s ruling Labour group actively enforcing the Coalition’s savage programme of austerity measures by ruthlessly cutting spending on social services and local amenities for the very working class people who make up a considerable section of Newcastle United’s support. Frankly, those who are prepared to bow to the will of the vile, rapacious Condem government in such a supine fashion are not deserving of our sympathy. Also, Simon lobbed me from 35 yards in a Bobby Robson Charity Foundation game at Hebburn Town last year. Never forgive; never forget. Incidentally, I’d quite like to hear Kinnear having a quiet word with Luke Edwards, but that’s by the by.

Similarly, to denounce Kinnear simply because he gets players’ names wrong, hideously embarrassing though the endless incidences of this was on the atrocious interview that coincided with the first and last time I’ll ever listen to Talk Sport on Monday just gone, may be absolutely correct; but if that is all we do, then we fail to grasp the significance of his appointment. Remember, Bobby Robson used to get the players’ names wrong all the time and, other than when NUFC fans showered him in hockle in September 1982, no-one had a bad word to say about him. I take no pleasure in pointing this out, but I sense that the eventual conclusion of what seemed to me to be childish, personal petulance by large numbers of our support, who demanded Pardew be removed last season as the team so painfully underachieved, has had some part in the last farcical turn of events at SJP.

Those who called for the manager’s head, without giving a second’s thought to who could credibly take on the role of Newcastle United manager, were not stormy petrels among our support, but belligerent teenagers with low concentration spans and an absolute inability to view things from a long term perspective. Let us hope that they have learned a painful lesson about the folly of placing any trust whatsoever in capitalist owners of football clubs. Kinnear’s appointment may partly be the result of bad tempered bairns screaming Pardew Out in the direction of Ashley, either on line or in print, but that is not the full story. Ashley may not have dismissed the manager, but he’s made Pardew’s position at best a compromised one and, if the manager had any balls, an utterly untenable one from which he ought to walk away now. The fact that, at the time of writing, radio silence has been maintained (the club only got round to belatedly confirming Lambezi’s departure and Kinnear’s arrival on Wednesday morning), other than to mention the manager will be remaining in current post, simply shows that Kinnear has had the unique effect of making Pardew look dignified during this whole affair, which takes some doing it has to be admitted.

Being charitable and less censorious, I do recognise that it may not actually be the fault of certain sections of the fans that Kinnear has been appointed, as the other element to this decision, other than a renaissance of the abhorrent cronyism that brought the club to its knees in 2008, is Ashley’s pathological need to have a useful idiot doing his dirty work in the football club; Kinnear is basically Ashley’s own Lavrentiy Beria.  Sadly, for whatever reason, we now have Kinnear on the payroll, an event that may be regarded as a new low water mark in the turbulent history of Ashley’s ownership. Such brow beating and navel gazing may be necessary, but there is a more pressing requirement for our thoughts. In analysing the implications of Kinnear’s appointment, the question that needs answering more than any other is; what precisely are we fans of Newcastle United are going to do about it?

While I can understand the deep frustration and sense of despair many supporters now feel, it is wrong to throw up our hands in frustration and say that we can’t do anything. Tactics, so vitally important on the pitch, have an equally compelling place among our support as we seek to make a principled stand. Do not despair; if we supporters work together, we are no longer weak, isolated voices crying in the wilderness; we will be strong, coherent, effective and we will be listened to. However, and this is of the utmost importance, we must  work together; egos, personal spats and historic feuds, need to be put to one side and every concerned Newcastle United fan, whether they are in the NUFC Fans United and toon talk camp, on the fence with Black & White Daft and nufc.com or failing to grasp the nettle with The Mag and the painfully ineffectual and utterly discredited NUST, or even if they’re unaligned and railing in fury and impotent anger on message boards, Twitter or blogs, has to come together as a broad and inclusive alliance, formed from the grassroots up, with the intention of reclaiming our club from the clutches of evil, rapacious capitalists who seek to serve only their own interests at every possible opportunity. What has gone on in the past must remain there; again, the time is right for all supporters to work together to express our collective fury and contempt at this decision and, hopefully, the desire to move the club forward by taking control of it ourselves.

However, it is abundantly clear to me that any supporter-led organisation needs to be very clear about principles and tactics from the outset. WB Yeats claimed The best lack all conviction, while the worst/ Are full of passionate intensity; while I do not necessarily accept this to be the case with our fans, it is of paramount importance that the Newcastle United support transforms itself in to a mass, democratic movement of all supporters, based on unshakeable principles and clear tactics, rather than being born of high minded intentions, but degenerating in to a shouty self-perpetuating vanguard of opportunists with little knowledge of and even less affection for Newcastle United. The danger of the future potential primacy of a cadre of inflexible ideologues using the travails of Newcastle United as a Trojan horse for their own ends, is that our fans will see through this and, rather than being inspired by their rhetoric or empowered to argue their own case, assume once again the depressing cloak of cynicism and the embittered shrug that is the keynote of so much of our recent history and attempts at engaging supporters for change. Were that to be the case, all motivation and enthusiasm for change will be lost.

As an example, look at the scorn and abuse NUFC Fans United engendered for being involved in the replacement of the Leazes gates. Yes I know they weren’t the iconic Gallowgate gates and it was a disgrace they’d somehow ended in possession of Wynyard Hall, like so much that belonged to the club in the 1990s, but surely denigrating the efforts of those who acted in the best interests of supporters to have a small slice of history replaced was not the conduct of self-serving egotists or people with a personal agenda to pursue. As supporters, we need to get over this and we need to work together.

 

 It is my fervent and unshakeable belief that what needs to happen to Newcastle United is that the club is eventually owned 100% by supporters of the team, whether they be born within a goal kick of the Gallowgate End or whether they are part of the worldwide Geordie diaspora and run in the interests of the support, the community and the good of the game as a whole. Am I talking the FC United of Manchester model? Indeed I am. Am I talking the FC Barcelona model? Indeed I am. Whether Newcastle United compete at Northern Premier or Champions League level is, in a sense, immaterial; what matters more than anything else is that the club is run on open, democratic, accountable and honourable lines. Of course I accept that there is a debate to be had and an argument to be won that playing football at six levels lower than we are now is good for Newcastle United, but I relish the challenge of making that case. Repeatedly.

For the moment, the important thing is to start the debate. There is a conduit for anger and for a meeting of all interested parties to try and find a way to work through this. NUFC Fans United have organised a meeting at the Labour Club on Monday 24^th June, 6.00pm-8.30; if you care about your club, please make every effort to attend.