Stag Do

 My predictably shambolic trip to Ross County 2 Livingston 4 -:

I truly believed that Cove Rangers 2 Kelty Hearts 2 on Saturday April 26^th would be my last Scottish game of 2024/2025. Similarly, when West Moor & Jesmond played out a thoroughly entertaining 3-3 draw with Wallington in the Alliance Premier a fortnight after that, I honestly felt I’d not see another game this season. However, things can change and, after a horrendous run of form after the late season split, Ross County ended up in 11^th place in the SPFL Premier League, meaning they were faced with a promotion / relegation play off against Livingston, with the second leg at home on Whit Bank Holiday Monday, following a 1-1 draw at Almondvale. As I’d “lost” a Scottish ground, following Bonnyrigg Rose’s demotion to the Lowland League following their play off defeat to East Kilbride, I decided to clear my head and get some Highland fresh air, as well as ticking off one of the most inaccessible of the remaining grounds on my yet to visit list. Best laid plans, eh?

Cards on the table, I don’t have much affection for either side. This is almost entirely due to the fact that Livingston (2004) and Ross County (2016) beat Hibs in finals of the Scottish League Cup. The former Ferranti Thistle, rather like Airdrie with their colonisation of the original Clydebank, seem to get a free pass from Scottish football fans for their Wimbledon to Milton Keynes style antics, not to mention their appalling jailbird squirt of a manager. We’ll not go into the merger of Inverness Caley and Inverness Thistle at this juncture. Unlike Victoria Park, I have been to Livi’s Almondvale ground (tragically no longer known as the Tony Macaroni Arena). That was back in Summer 1999, when Newcastle United were embarking upon a crash course to oblivion under Ruud Gullit. What ended in the pouring rain at home to the Mackems, with Ferguson and Shearer on the bench, started with Lionel Perez in goal as we succumbed to an absolutely gutless 2-0 defeat in the first pre-season friendly of the season.

Other than the aforementioned League Cup final, I’d seen Ross County twice elsewhere; a 1-1 draw at Partick Thistle in December 2012, where an elderly Jags fan almost attacked the referee for giving a fair enough penalty, only being held back by his visibly embarrassed son, and in a 3-1 loss at Motherwell in September 2021, where they had 43 fans in that huge away stand.

Anyway, ticket secured, hotel room reserved, and train tickets booked, I arrived at Central in plenty of time for the 11.54 to Waverley. This is when I made my first, crucial mistake. As I get older, I move slower that I did so I thought the extra 9 minutes I’d gain catching the 11.45 instead, would help me with a tightish connection for the Inverness train. Theoretically a good idea, scuppered by being stuck at signals south of Berwick because of a mechanical fault. As we stood idle, the 11.54 rushed past and we eventually limped into Edinburgh at 14.00. The 13.31 direct to Inverness long gone, I took the 14.42 to Perth and thence the 16.50 to Inverness and the 18.35 to Dingwall, arriving at 19.15 instead of the scheduled 17.46. There was no leisurely check in, relaxing shower and tasty pub meal in the appealing looking Mallard Inn, as things went from the ridiculous to the distressing.

As you can probably imagine, the phone signal for most of the Perth to Inverness journey is non-existent, but I did get a message from booking.com that the Cromarty View Hotel had cancelled my booking and refunded me the cash, because of “unforeseen circumstances.” Probably a chance to sell my room to two punters instead of just me. All was not lost though; I was being given a free room (no breakfast mind) at the Waverley Lodge, which was much closer to the ground and its proximity to the home of The Staggies would allow me to check in before the game. Well, that’s what I thought. The receptionist at The Waverley Lodge was a surly Mackem ex-con, who informed me my room was actually in their annex, just across the road. In the attic above the 147 Snooker Club, outside of which congregated a knot of pissed druggies, smoking weed. I was in the furthest room from the entrance at least, though it had no en-suite, not even a sink, no lightbulb and a telly hanging off the wall. At least I wasn’t paying for it. Leaving immediately after I chucked my bag in the room, I squeezed past half a dozen unfriendly junky winos before heading for the ground. At least once I was in the ground my troubles seemed to be over, and I bagged myself an excellent steak pie and a more than adequate coffee, then went to take my seat. At least, I tried to, when I discovered A157 didn’t exist as the row only went up to 154.

Finding an apologetic young steward, I stood around looking useless, while he tried to contact his supervisor. The message was “sit in any empty seat,” so when the teams ran out, I did, firmly aware that my support was now 100% behind Livi and their voluble 653 travelling fans directly to my left, who included my mate David Stoker. Typically, this ensured that Ross County roared into a rapid 2-0 lead, courtesy of a good move down the left and a simple tap-in from Josh Nisbet on 6 minutes, followed by a decent finish after a defensive howler on 24 minutes by Ronan Hale. With the tie now standing at 3-1 on aggregate and County looking dangerous with every attack, it looked like game over. Then, on 39 minutes, Jordan Smith pulled a goal back after a wonderful run and finish from the left side of the area. There were some excellent goals in this game I must admit.

After a breathless first half, my thoughts returned to the situation waiting for me back at the doss house, when the whistle blew. I hoped the game would go to extra time and penalties, so the Snooker Club might had rid itself of the dodgy clientele by the time I got back. The second half was so enthralling, I didn’t give my lousy lodgings a second thought. County’s keeper Amissah made a brilliant double block from a free kick on 57 minutes but was powerless to stop Danny Wilson’s close range header after his second save. This shifted the whole momentum of the tie and four minutes later, Robbie Muirhead curled in a glorious, bending finish for what proved to be the winner. The Staggies fans in the 4,418 crowd knew the game was up, as did their team who never seriously threatened the Livi goal after that. In injury time, substitute Tete Yengi shrugged off a weak challenge and finished calmly with what turned out to be the last kick of the game, making the final score Ross County 2 Livingston 4. Minor pandemonium ensued with almost all the Livi fans invading the pitch and embracing players and their snippy little manager Martindale, who would probably have been more at home in the opposite Jail End, if you hear where I’m coming from.

In contrast the home fans melted away, muttering but not incensed as they recognised that after play-off escapes in the last 2 seasons, their number was up. Rarely have I come across such a stoic support. Indeed, they didn’t sing a single song all night. After the final whistle, I hung around the dull and functional little ground in the dull and functional little town that I’ll never visit again, looking for David, but didn’t see him and left, bought a bottle of Fanta from a late opening shop and went back to my room to watch the highlights on Sportscene, with my head tilted on a 90 degree angle to counteract the perilous position of the set, while listening to the rain hammering on my inadequate skylight that would neither open, nor close properly. I slept fitfully, woken several times by shouts and slamming doors on the floors below. In the morning, I attempted a shower in the filthy communal bathroom, but it didn’t work properly, so made a coffee and left with it half drunk, then caught the 10.02 to Inverness, 10.50 to Waverley and 15.00 back home.

On the way, I mused at the plan of action needed for newcomers East Kilbride, as well as the remaining geographical outliers of Inverness Caledonian Thistle, Peterhead and Stranraer, all of which will require overnight stays. There are neither Premier Inns nor Travelodges in the latter two places. Nevertheless, I await the release of group stage Scottish League Cup fixtures with interest. It’s a tough job doing the 42, but it’s a challenge I’m up for.