The Privileged Few

I'd like to dedicate this week's blog to Gary and Kev, who've just been lucky enough to witness Durham's thrilling 2 wicket win against Lancashire in Southport. This is a victory all the sweeter considering Lancashire wouldn't allow Kev to take his dog Harry with them.

For the cricket devotee, perhaps the two most enduring, erroneous and irritating myths propagated about the world’s most fascinating sport are that firstly it is solely for the elite and secondly it is boring. While the contempt I hold for those who spread such mendacious nonsense is steadfast and inflexible, it is important to remember how easy it is to rebut their lies. Take a look around the club cricket scene in the north east; it remains in rude health in the former mining communities of Durham and Northumberland. Let’s be honest, there’s not many double-barrelled, cosseted playboys in Lamborghinis pulling up outside Burnmoor, Backworth or Bates Cottages, accompanied by a bevy of buxom debutantes swigging Bollinger from the bottle; more’s the pity.

How anyone can fail to be seduced by the pungent bouquet of palpable tension that hangs heavy over the outfield late Saturday afternoon as NEPL games reach their conclusions is beyond my comprehension. Winning draws; losing draws. Batting points; bowling points. The arcane tapestry of statistical beauty that enthrals those of us who appreciate the beguiling mysteries of the game. Boring? My arse.

I take as my text Tynemouth’s successive fixtures away to South North on July 9^th and home to Gateshead Fell the week after. The night before the South North game, the Croons had made it to the NEPL 20/20 finals day at the Emirates after beating Felling in a rearranged quarter final. At the first time of asking on Friday 1^st, Felling had made an ominously decent start and were 70/3 after 11 when the rains came down so hard there were puddles on the outfield within minutes. At least two inches must have fallen in half an hour. Obviously the game was abandoned amid cascading torrents and when we reassembled a week later for the rearranged clash between the clubs from my present and past lives; Tynemouth batted first and made a solid, if unspectacular 126/5. Felling were not overawed; they looked up for it and advanced to 34/0 after 5, at which point they began to lose wickets with metronymic regularity. By the time the innings closed, Felling had been restricted to 90/9 and I’d had about 5 pints of Jennings Cumberland Ale, which I topped up to a nice round gallon with a trio of Bass in The Tynemouth Lodge.  Incidentally, anyone calling cricket fans posh may like to discuss their opinions with the Felling supporter who endlessly lapped the boundary in the company of his excitable Rottweiler, struggling endlessly for freedom on a taut, steel chain.

On the Saturday, a heavy morning shower delayed play. This allied with the anaesthetic qualities of good real ale and the arrival of the football season, in the shape of Benfield’s first pre-season friendly, away to Walker Central, meant my cricket watching was restricted to the final session. Obviously I’d kept in touch with events in Gosforth on line and was aware Tynemouth had been dismissed for 198 by the Manchester City / Chelsea of the NEPL.  To be honest, it didn’t look good when South North went to tea 48/0 soon after I arrived.  At that point, the inevitable downpour from the massing clouds, whose purple hues oscillated between the colours of plums and bruises, seemed a depleted Tynemouth’s only hope of escaping defeat.

However, just as a routine home win seemed a knocking bet, Hymers, Pollard and especially Tahir Khan, who returned figures of 3/33 from 19, began to bowl so well that any result suddenly appeared possible. Instead of praying for a storm, we beseeched the rain gods to refrain, which they did until almost 8 o’clock. At that point South North were 154/8 from 48 overs; within a minute of the first heavy, cold drops from the upper atmosphere driving the players reluctantly from the field, the streets and pavements of leafy NE3 were rivers. The last 5 overs, including Tahir’s potential final hurrah, were lost. Tynemouth took a winning draw, 14 points and almost the biggest scalp in the league. Benfield may have won a pleasant kickabout 4-3 in mid-afternoon sunshine, but the early evening events in Gosforth were what really enthralled me that weekend.

The weekend after was characterised by glorious sunshine. Not only did Tynemouth have the seeming home banker of bottom placed Gateshead Fell, but there was the 20/20 finals day at the Emirates to look forward to on the Sunday. I’d intended to visit Durham’s home ground for the 20/20 game against Notts on June 30^th, as I’d had the dubious pleasure of attending a staff development course in Spennymoor the same day. Unfortunately Tudhoe were without a fixture, so I couldn’t tick that one off. Heading back to Durham City, the bus made good time until becoming snarled in post-graduation traffic on the southern outskirts. Things weren’t moving and by the time my second bus had reached Chester Moor, Twitter told me 11 overs had been bowled already. I departed from my plan and stayed on the bus; within 20 minutes another biblical thunderstorm had seen the game abandoned after 17 overs, so I’d basically saved myself £20 (or 6 pints of Bass in The Lodge, if you prefer) by not going.

After the aborted 20/20 game against Felling, I’d seen Gateshead Fell in action against Benwell Hill on the Saturday. Bearing in mind Tynemouth v South Shields was abandoned with the visitors 40/1 that day; it was a good choice to head to Low Fell on the first Saturday of the month. I was delighted to be in the company of Gary and Phil, though saddened by the non-appearance of Harry and Kev, as the day had been designated the first annual Ponces’ Picnic. Laura had prepared us a quite sumptuous feast, which was in keeping with Kyle Coetzer’s glorious batting. The Scotland international made a stylish 107 out of  the Hill’s 213/9 declared. When Fell subsided to 22/4, it seemed as if the game would be over by tea. However, dour, obdurate batting by Richard Smith and Sam Rosebery saw Gateshead Fell crawl to 88 without further mishap when the freezing wind sapped our collective strength and we headed off to watch the France v Germany Euro semi-final over pints. In the end, Fell managed 121/6 from 49 overs, progressing at the kind of glacial pace both Robert Altman and Chris Tavare would have been proud of.

The one thing I took away from that game, apart from half a dozen smashed cupcakes that still tasted delicious the day after, was the awareness that Gateshead Fell would not throw their wickets away lightly. I was still conscious of this as Tynemouth enjoyed a productive and entertaining innings that saw the Croons rack up 237/9 declared from 57 overs, leaving Gateshead Fell with 63 overs to bat through. With everything looking rosy, I headed off to Whitley Bay against Stockport Town. I had been expecting Stockport County and a tight game; I was twice disappointed. Stockport Town are allegedly at Northern League D2 level, but their comic indecision in defence that saw them 3-0 down courtesy of a trio of howlers after only 15 minutes, suggests the standard of North West Counties Division 1 isn’t the highest. They did come back into the game with a brace of very late headers, but the 4-2 scoreline flattered them. Their number 9 was called Mason Dunkerley-Hemlin, which is an early contender for name of the season.

Full time at Hillheads and my pal Martin obliged us with a lift back to Tynemouth. When I say us, I include Laura, who was visiting a cricket ground for only the second time in her life; the first was South North for the beer festival last year, where the concurrent 20/20 game against Boldon was something less than a minor attraction for her, in comparison to the craft ciders and complimentary Indian buffet. I love introducing people to grassroots sport, not that I needed to with Martin as he’s a long time Tynemouth cricket devotee, but Laura thoroughly enjoyed herself. That said I do suspect she was actually playing Pokemon GO as we did our laps of the boundary. After Martin left, Ginger Dave joined us. His dad played for Gateshead Fell in the distant past, losing his top teeth for them in the process, and Dave watched the same fixture with me last summer, when Fell slumped to 51 all out after Tynemouth made 176.

Last year, the game was over by 3.00; this year it was long after 8 when proceedings drew to a halt.  Despite Tahir Khan’s exemplary spell of 6/20 from 20 overs, Gateshead Fell hung in there. They didn’t try to score; they just tried not to lose. When the curtain finally fell, they were 7 balls from a morale-boosting draw, at which point Martyn Pollard took his second wicket, to leave the visitors all out for 136. The elation at such a hard-earned victory was palpable on both sides of the rope. The NEPL is still up for grabs, with Newcastle, South North, Tynemouth and Chester le Street all in with a shout. I’m enjoying this fascinating contest more with each passing week. I’m also starting to grow increasing interested in the Banks cups and the 2^nd XI 20/20 competitions as they move towards the business end.

One trophy that has already been awarded is the NEPL 20/20 title, which went to Durham Academy. I had been looking forward to seeing Tynemouth in the finals, but was disappointed with a draw that saw the Croons on first against Stockton at high noon; CLS against the Academy came in mid-afternoon, with the final under lights. I can see why players would want to play at the Emirates, but for clubs keen to make a few quid from refreshments and supporters, it really isn’t a great deal of fun being among a gathering of approximately 65 in a ground that holds 17,000. There’s simply no sense of occasion when you’re swamped by empty seats. Having become used to the interaction with players at club games, the sheer distance separating the two elements of the sport was less than engaging. Yes it’s a lovely place to watch first class cricket, but I’d have been as happy going to Ropery Lane as the Riverside.

The lack of atmosphere was possibly why the occasion didn’t catch fire for me. It was a beautiful day, but the best weather of the year was compromised by a terrible PA system that sputtered out rap and rock inanities after every boundary, over and wicket. So bad was the sound quality, I thought I was developing tinnitus. Meanwhile Tynemouth made 125/8 from their overs, before Stockton beat us off the final ball, posting 126/6 to win by 4 wickets. Durham beat Chester Le Street in the next semi and then won the final. I cleared off after the first game. Not in a sulk mind you. It was great to see Tynemouth in this setting and to catch up with my mate Norman from Anfield Plain, but I do hope the NEPL think about next year’s venue carefully.

Having exited the Riverside, I could have gone straight home but, having missed Northumberland’s rain-wrecked, drawn game with Bedfordshire at Burnopfield the other week; I decided to call into Jesmond to catch a bit of the three day game against Hertfordshire. By the time I arrived, the visitors’ innings was winding down; Jacques Du Toit took the final wicket as Hertfordshire made 326 from 87.5 overs. In reply, Northumberland were steady enough in accumulating 37/0, so things were finely balanced at the close. Monday’s play was a huge achievement for the home team; a 240 run stand for the opening wicket by Jessop and Whaley, not to mention 105 from 57 by Captain Nicotine himself, saw Northumberland finish on 436/6 after 90 overs, before Hertfordshire inched ahead on 121/4 at the close. Tuesday morning was all about Sameet Brar, so lacklustre for Benwell against Gateshead Fell last time I’d seen him, who bowled with pace and accuracy, collecting 4/42 as Hertfordshire were dismissed for 203. Whaley and Jessop put on 86 for the opening wicket, as Northumberland eased home on 95/1 by 2.30. Never has Jesmond looked more beautiful than it did that July Tuesday with Northumberland proudly on top of the Minor Counties East table. Nowhere is more beautiful than Osborne Avenue in bloom.

So, best of luck to Tynemouth firsts against Durham Academy in the NEPL and Chester le Street in both league and cup, not to mention the seconds away to Brandon in the 20/20 quarter final. Best of luck also to Northumberland away to Norfolk in their next 3 day game. Best of luck to Geoff Cook, Jacques du Toit, Olly McGee and Alan McKenna, who all took the time to have a quick word. Fellas, it is really appreciated. The privileged few in local cricket are we who have the honour of watching such fine athletes and gentlemen in action. Best of luck to us all for decent weather until season’s end and best of luck to me, in finding Clontarf Cricket Club for the Leinster Senior Cup final against YMCA on Saturday 30^th July.