Last weekend, Newcastle played Hull City and the Mackems
lost, humiliatingly & hilariously, to Man City. The last time I remember that happening was on 11th
May 1991, at the end of the most boring season in Newcastle United’s history. On that day, the vile Mr Charity Broadband Quinn, was instrumental in relegating sunderland, proving he's only ever had his own interests at heart & not theirs; I'd like to dedicate Toure, Navas & Nasri's goals to him. As a former citeh player, I'm sure he enjoyed them. Going back to thinking about the 1990/1991 campaign, which was the greatest example of sporting ennui I could possibly imagine, I decided to pen something brief about it, for this Saturday's Heaton Stannington programme for the visit of Darlington Railway Athletic. I set myself the task of writing a 1 sentence
review of all 46 league games and 5 cup ties that comprised our race to assure
the highly coveted 13th place in Division 2. Here goes, with a picture especially selected for Declan McGrath who made his first visit to St. James' Park for the dismal 1-0 victory over Watford on 24th November 1990…
Sat 25 Aug 1990 PLYMOUTH ARGYLE
H League W 2-0 Benny Kristensen’s quickfire double caused opening day optimism.
Sat 01 Sep 1990 Blackburn Rovers
A League W 1-0 Liam O’Brien’s 97th winner caused bedlam on the crumbling Darwen End terrace
Sat 08 Sep 1990 MILLWALL
H League L 1-2 Jimmy Carter looked well worth the £800k Dalglish was to waste on him on this performance.
Sat 15 Sep 1990 Port Vale
A League W 1-0 We always won at Vale Park.
Tue 18 Sep 1990 Sheffield Wednesday
A League D 2-2 Neil Simpson actually played and we conceded a 90th minute equaliser.
Sat 22 Sep 1990 WEST HAM UNITED
H League D 1-1 Burridge threw two points away, being caught in front of the East Stand and trying to play right back.
Tue 25 Sep 1990 Middlesbrough
A League Cup L 0-2 The usual hammering at Beastville.
Sat 29 Sep 1990 Bristol City
A League L 0-1 Kevin Carr sent off and that’s about it.
Wed 03 Oct 1990 MIDDLESBROUGH
H League D 0-0 Mickey Quinn sent off for not kicking Pears in the head.
Sat 06 Oct 1990 PORTSMOUTH
H League W 2-1 John Anderson’s own goal; I wrote about it here http://payaso-de-mierda.blogspot.co.uk/2013/08/false-memory-syndrome.html
Wed 10 Oct 1990 MIDDLESBROUGH
H League Cup W 1-0 An all ticket crowd of less than 13k
Sat 13 Oct 1990 Oxford United
A League D 0-0 A game of staggering ineptitude
Sat 20 Oct 1990 Ipswich Town
A League L 1-2 Kristensen sent off in a rather bad tempered encounter.
Wed 24 Oct 1990 CHARLTON ATHLETIC
H League L 1-3 A deplorable defeat
Sat 27 Oct 1990 WEST BROMWICH ALBION
H League D 1-1 Missed O’Brien’s equaliser having a second half time pint.
Sat 03 Nov 1990 Hull City
A League L 1-2 Great weekend down at my sister’s student gaffe, ruined by a rank game.
Sat 10 Nov 1990 Wolverhampton Wanderers
A League L 1-2 Lee Clark’s first goal, but a dreadful defeat
Sat 17 Nov 1990 BARNSLEY
H League D 0-0 My first proper date with my ex-wife, who is a Barnsley fan; yes, my ex-wife
Sat 24 Nov 1990 WATFORD
H League W 1-0 Gary Porter skied a penalty and Quinn converted one on a freezing afternoon.
Sat 01 Dec 1990 Leicester City
A League L 4-5 Entertaining, but ultimately fruitless afternoon.
Sun 16 Dec 1990 Plymouth Argyle
A League W 1-0 Gavin Peacock’s winner caused Charles Harrison to have hysterics on Metro.
Sat 22 Dec 1990 Bristol Rovers
A League D 1-1 Was still in bed at full time after a decent night out.
Wed 26 Dec 1990 SWINDON TOWN
H League D 1-1 Dillon missed from 6 inches out at the Leazes End.
Sat 29 Dec 1990 NOTTS. COUNTY
H League L 0-2 Quite embarrassing, to say the least.
Tue 01 Jan 1991 Oldham Athletic
A League D 1-1 Stimson’s OG 30 seconds from time ruined the New Year.
Sat 05 Jan 1991 DERBY COUNTY
H F.A. Cup W 2-0 Stimson’s wonderful free kick and Quinn’s thumping volley caused a giant killing.
Sat 12 Jan 1991 BLACKBURN ROVERS
H League W 1-0 Dave Mitchell became an NUFC legend…
Wed 16 Jan 1991 Brighton & Hove Albion
A League L 2-4 Mike Small (remember him?) tortured us
Sat 19 Jan 1991 Millwall
A League W 1-0 Brave win against the odds.
Sat 02 Feb 1991 PORT VALE
H League W 2-0 Delicious Gavin Peacock lob sealed victory.
Wed 13 Feb 1991 NOTTINGHAM FOREST
H F.A. Cup D 2-2 If Steve Watson had accepted that chance to make it 3-0….
Mon 18 Feb 1991 Nottingham Forest
A F.A. Cup L 0-3 Live on TV, we got humped.
Sat 23 Feb 1991 WOLVERHAMPTON WANDERERS
H League D 0-0 Paul Moran’s entire NUFC career, ended by him missing an open goal.
Wed 27 Feb 1991 BRIGHTON & HOVE ALBION
H League D 0-0 Cold and terrible.
Sat 02 Mar 1991 LEICESTER CITY
H League W 2-1 Warm and terrible, but we won.
Sat 09 Mar 1991 Watford
A League W 2-1 John Anderson scored the last goal David James conceded for Watford.
Tue 12 Mar 1991 Middlesbrough
A League L 0-3 Steve Watson’s forward roll and a predictable hammering.
Sat 16 Mar 1991 BRISTOL CITY
H League D 0-0 Utterly appalling.
Sat 23 Mar 1991 Portsmouth
A League W 1-0 Jim Smith’s last game; typically he quits after we win.
Sat 30 Mar 1991 Swindon Town
A League L 2-3 Ardiles plots our downfall, then joins straight afterwards.
Mon 01 Apr 1991 BRISTOL ROVERS
H League L 0-2 The bounce a new manager can bring….
Sat 06 Apr 1991 Notts. County
A League L 0-3 The biggest humping of the season.
Wed 10 Apr 1991 OXFORD UNITED
H League D 2-2 Brian Stein’s classic volley in the famous replayed 10,004 game.
Sat 13 Apr 1991 OLDHAM ATHLETIC
H League W 3-2 We looked like Brazil 70 for the first hour of this one.
Wed 17 Apr 1991 SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY
H League W 1-0 Kevin Brock’s mishit cross won it for us.
Sat 20 Apr 1991 IPSWICH TOWN
H League D 2-2 Decent, end to end game actually.
Wed 24 Apr 1991 West Ham United
A League D 1-1 Charles Harrison claimed we were magnificent in this one.
Sat 27 Apr 1991 Charlton Athletic
A League L 0-1 We weren’t three days later on our next trip to the smoke.
Sat 04 May 1991 West Bromwich Albion
A League D 1-1 The Baggies went down after this one; sorry lads.
Tue 07 May 1991 Barnsley
A League D 1-1 A stylish performance on a lovely, sunny evening.
Sat 11 May 1991 HULL CITY
H League L 1-2 Lee Clark’s blinding goal on the day the Mackems went down.
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