Fragments of Unpopular Culture 1: Grand Stann View

As my articles for the Percy Main programme this season are factual results round-ups, I've decided not to put them on here. Instead, bearing in mind it is Non League Day next Saturday, I'm resurrecting some bits I did in the past that never made it on to here. This is an article about Heaton Stannington from the Gilford Park programme of January 2008, which ended 2-0 to Gilford Park. Over the next week, several other uncollected scribblings of mine will appear here.

Grand Stann View

Here are a couple of dates to consider: Saturday May 2nd 1998 and Saturday August 22^nd. On the former date Newcastle beat Chelsea 3-1 at St. James Park and I moved in to the eastern Newcastle suburb of High Heaton; a petit bourgeois paradise that lies athwart and betwixt Jesmond Dene and Cochrane Park, which the astute reader will recognise as the name of the home ground of fellow Northern Alliance Premier division, probably only until the end of this season admittedly, side Newcastle University.

On the latter date, Newcastle drew 1-1 with Chelsea at Stamford Bridge in what was to be Kenny Dalglish’s last game in charge, and I attended Grounsell Park, which is literally at the end of the street I’d moved in to, for the first time, to watch Heaton Stannington beat Highfields (now Berwick United) 2-0. I was back then a regular watcher of Northern league football, but this was my first ever experience of the Northern Alliance. It impressed me so much that I moved to Bratislava a year later without watching another game.

Grounsell Park has been massively improved; there is hard standing and parking for 30 cars, 2 picnic tables, a wooden smoking shelter and the clubhouse where former joint manager and now secretary Derek Thompson is to be found watching Sky Sports News during Stann games. Hot drinks are available from the Maxpax machine in ATS tyres on the corner of Cleveland Gardens, opposite Cragside Primary School. Sandwiches may be purchased from High Heaton Newsagents, with hot food from the Newton Tandoori or Newton Chop Suey House a possibility for evening games. There is also a locksmith’s, a United Reformed Church, two hairdressers, an off licence and a reflexologist in this parade of shops. What more could one ask for? It’s the sort of place to call home.

In 2001, I moved back to High Heaton, to a house that is one street away from a Northern Alliance ground; Newcastle University’s to be precise. What other suburbs can boast two Northern Alliance sides, as well as 3 Northern league sides (Team Northumbria, West Allotment Celtic and Newcastle Benfield) within a mile?

Let’s get this straight; I’m not a Heaton Stannington fan, I am a Heaton Stann watcher. I have season tickets for Newcastle United and Benfield, who are my non-league team. I also keep an eye on Percy Main in the Alliance, though the side I watch the most in that league are Heaton Stannington, even if I don’t support them.

I’ve seen them 5 times at home this season: Shankhouse, won 1-0, 22^nd August, Ashington Colliers, won 3-1, 15th September, Harraby, lost 3-1, 29^th September, Newcastle University, won 4-3, 1^st December and Carlisle City, drew 1-1, 19^th January, if you’re interested. I really want them to do well and I hope they beat Gilford Park today, but I’m not a fan. I only watch them.

I won’t be at this game as I try to play myself in the North East Over 40s League and I’ll have spent all morning at Fulwell Grange picking the ball out of the net against the League leaders, so I’ll probably be at West Allotment v Nissan in the Northern League; Newcastle are at Arsenal and Benfield are at Shildon and I won’t be watching either of them.

I’ll get a match report either from Stann’s tousled-haired, workie-ticket midfielder Dom Elliott on Monday in my lesson (I am an adult education lecturer and he’s my student) or on Monday night from Decka Oman the Stann manager, who plays 6-a-side with a crowd of us has-beens each week. It’ll be biased, but I’ll believe them, as they’re harder than me.